09 February 2006

Chinese New Year Trailer: Mission Implinkable

It's the Chinese New Year in the Maldives and someone is also having a birthday party. Stranger yet, plink has been allowed to carry the birthday cake, with sparklers.

'Aack!' as feared, plink trips again. Cake and sparklers travel briefly skywards, then earthwards. A number of attendees dive in slow motion, converging on the falling cake.

The outstretched hand of Tan Yee Wei saves the cake (and party), but the sparklers bounce free. Spraying fire as they tumble through the air, they land on a conveniently placed fuse, which starts to burn.

*Original Mission Impossible theme starts, with flute solo*

'Oh no!' plink scurries over the struggling mass of party-goers and sprints after the fast-burning fuse. Yee Wei gives chase, cake still in hand.

*fuse burns from left to right across the screen*

KucingGatal, watching from across the room, sees the fuse burning towards furniture. Moving quickly and changing shape as only a Kucing can, she darts under the most likely chair. Shredded carpet glints in the sunlight as she tears after the flame.

LB, struggling with the birthday durian, drops mallet and spike. Taking off after the Kucing, he nearly trips over plink but eventually does over YeeWei. Tumbling and rolling, the disoriented duo somehow manage to regain their feet and keep going after the fire.

Counting her angpau haul, Yvy suddenly becomes aware of a hissing noise. Turning to admonish the Kucing, it becomes apparent that there is a fire headed towards her. Sampan paddle in hand, Yvy dives for the burning fuse as well.

There is a tangle of four as Yvy, plink, Yee Wei and LBond come together again. Meanwhile the fuse continues to burn quickly.

*fuse burns from right to left across the screen*

Hedonistics Anonymous is enjoying sashimi, surreptitiously picking the bits off from the Yee Sang. Puzzled by the sudden smell of burning, she looks under the table to see the lit fuse spark its way towards her. The Hedo suddenly sees Kucing come through and leap towards her.

Both the cat and spark are gone in a flash and HA returns to her meal. She is interrupted by a sudden commotion as people dive under the table, under her chair, across her meal, everywhere. Giving up, Hedonistics shrugs her shoulders and gives chase as well.

Metria is reading on a couch, totally engrossed in her book. The tide of humanity washes over, under and through, carrying her with it. Not noticing the commotion, she stops only to turn the page.

*fuse burns from left to right again across the screen*

The Simple American steps back and admires his handywork. Combining American know-how with Thai firepower gives the best value for money, othewise known as the biggest bang for your buck. Eight strings of firecrackers, each one eight feet long, dangle from the balcony. SAm is glad that the display is properly set up.

Turning to look for the end of the fuse, he is suddenly passed by the blazing spark and then by the stampede after it.

*filmed in slow motion*

Arm outstretched, SAm starts after the seething mass of humanity (and cat). As the fuse branches, one spark becomes two, then four and eight. Jaws drop en masse as the crowd suddenly sees the Damocles' Sword of firecrackers hanging above.

Firecrackers fill the air with smoke and earsplitting noise. Shreds of red paper fill the air. For a long moment, smoke, explosions and red paper hide everything.

All is quiet. All that remains is a large pile of red paper on the drive. Then everyone bursts out, scattering red everywhere.

'Gong Xi Fa Cai!'

*end MI theme with trumpet fanfare*


At 8:44 pm, Blogger L B said...

LOL! Metria certainly is a cool cat..
but I like that tangle of Four part.. *brushes plink paper off lapel*

At 9:46 pm, Anonymous yvy said...


*clapclapclapclap* so now my sampan paddle is more femes than i am lar. lol :P

At 11:47 pm, Blogger Simple American said...

See ya in a bit. Going to put in a call to Thailand. I wanna do that again.

At 12:46 am, Blogger plink said...

LB: For some reason, we like to see people crashing into one another. It's our emotional repression speaking, probably.
SAm: Phoning for more firepower?
Yvy: Hehe... sampan paddle, piakking; GO GIRL!
I want to do a John Wu version where everyone looks up at the firecrackers, doves fly past and metria snaps her book shut before all the crackers go off.

At 3:08 am, Blogger Lao Chen said...


Btw, if it happens to be your bday, happy birthday.

I'm still grinnng from the adrenalin.

At 7:50 pm, Blogger plink said...

YeeWei: TQVMuch! But no, my birthday isn't due for a while yet. It *might* have just been an excuse to get something with fire on = BDay cake. ;)

At 11:21 pm, Blogger Simple American said...

I can blow up, uh, I mean light up birthday cakes too when the occasion calls for it.

And as far as ordering more pyrotecnics, ya know plinkysan I gots to be ready at all times. Boys Scout motto is be prepared.

At 7:14 am, Blogger Metria said...

Did someone mention me?

*continues reading very interesting book about Controlling People's Minds through the Subtle Use of Sexy Leg Crossing*

*crosses legs sexily in a subtle manner*

At 10:24 am, Anonymous yvy said...

khor...does it mean we can skip the cake throwing session n get smashed by cake instead??? lol :P

At 11:24 am, Blogger fantasyflier said...

LOL this is really fun..
i want in on the next film, too much fun to want out! hehe

At 2:38 pm, Blogger Kucing Gatal said...

Eh, I died ke???

At 4:59 pm, Blogger Simple American said...

Sure mui. Why not?

At 8:18 pm, Blogger L B said...

We really need a Kick-Ass poster of the movie with Metria's pose.. *mind control working*

At 1:32 pm, Blogger Lao Chen said...

lol yes that would be a nice poster...

*imagines long legs crossing sexily in a subtle manner*

At 5:52 pm, Blogger L B said...

Shouldn't we hold like a nice ceremony with lots of cherry blossom petals floating in slo-mo, a couple of fake plastic pigeons floating across the screen, everyone dressed in cool whites and creams, white magnolias, a bit of a slight breeze swaying the coconut fronds, a lone scottish piper in the background wailing, and tables and tables of yummy pastries & champagne, for Kuching Gatal's "death scene"?..

Then a lone dark assassin in the form of the fantasyflier glide in by parachute, and says, "Heck, too late again!"?..

At 7:13 pm, Blogger Kucing Gatal said...

Maybe some hot dude can give me the kiss of life. I'm not too fussy, James Marsden will do.

He and I will be very happy together for the rest of my 8 lives.

At 2:05 am, Blogger plink said...

KG: Where got died?!?!
*Checks script*
I thought you and everyybody else kena GongXiFaCai under the firecrackers?
*fanfanfan KG*
James Marden indeed.... :)
metria: Ooo... LB and Yee Wei are fans! Better than lottery win, no?
SAm: Our resident pyrotechnician (is that even a word?) Boy Scout... hmm... I think I feel another idea coming.... TQ!
YeeWei: I'm sure metria will only be too happy to write Metria Instinct for you....

At 10:30 am, Anonymous yvy, jr bomber said...

do i get to asssist in blowing up the cake? heck..i'm suddenly into blowing up things too...*lights more banned 100 meter long redhot crackers*

*runs away n rubs hands in glee n full of anticiaption for the smell of gun powder & red paper strewn all over ~ might mess up KG's 'pengsan' scene though. shrugs.*

At 2:32 pm, Blogger Hedonistics Anonymous said...

plinky! you've been tagged.. again! :)


refer to the 2nd half of the post, yea? :)

At 3:56 pm, Blogger plink said...

Yvy: Firestarter! Twisted firestarter! Semua olang pyromaniac ka?
HA: Yioh! Why kena tag again? And I'm not a Kuching girl. PJ, Pertarling Jayar! :D

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