24 April 2006

My Fair Lady; Malaysian style

Not far from the Sin Hock Seng Kopitiam at SS2, is another coffee shop, the self-styled Restoran Limho Mee Yorke (sic). Professor LinPeh, the renowned orange-haired linguistician, is near to defeat.
Sat at a table with his friend
Chee K. Peckering, the good professor laments his failure to transform the Western-educated Eliza Nozalot into a class-A Ah Lian.
Eliza pays no attention. She concentrates instead on speaking into a strange device, little more than a tube connected to the innards of Robert’s Char Koay Teow gas burner. The blue and orange flames flicker slightly as Eliza practices her Benglish….
N.B: Special glossary at end of post. ;)

Eliza: ‘Aiya. ‘Aiya. [frowns]
PLP: Dielah. Cannot oreddy. [shakes head]
CKP: Yalah. Jialat. Where can make MSc to sounds like proper Ah Lian?
Eliza: ‘Aiya. ‘Aiya. [frowns]
PLP: Say 'Haiyah!' orso cannot. Robert’s fire also cannot up! [to server] Lenglui!
Server: Mau minum apa?
PLP: Teh ais satu. [turns back to CKP] Yammkung lor. How to win bet liddis?
Eliza: Haiyah. [flame]
PLP/CKP: o_O?!?!
Eliza: Haiyah!. [FLAME]
CKP: By George, she’s got it. By George, she’s got it!
PLP: Li kong simmik?
CKP: Soli, soli! I meant walauweh, show kaler orredy worr….
Eliza: HAIYAH! [F..L..A..M..E.!]
CKP: By G… Wahlau!
PLP: -_-``
[roll music intro]
Eliza: Hurricanes Hardly Happen In Hertfordshire. [flameflameflameflame]
PLP: Woi… dunpraypraylah!
Eliza: Teehee…. Acherly horr [flame], Hari-cane Heppern in Hon-diu-larse. [flameflameFLAME!]
CKP: Hosay liao! And rain orways fall where?
Eliza: On the plane! On the plane!
PLP: And where this plane?
Eliza: [sings] Air Asia mya plane!
CKP: Nao hiah! Sibeh ho liao!
Everyone: [dance fengtao] Air Asia plane always kena by rain ….

Special glossary:
Jialat: adj; hopeless, situation irrecoverable. Hokkien
Lenglui: n; lit. ‘pretty girl,’; mode of address for young lady. Cantonese.
Lengjai: n; lit. ‘pretty boy,’; mode of address for young man. Cantonese.
Haiyah: interj; expression of exasperation. Malaysian/Singaporean.
Yammkung: adj; see jialat. Cantonese.
Li kong simmik: interr; ‘what are you saying?’ Hokkien/Singaporean.
Walauweh: interj; expressing incredulity. Singaporean/Malaysian
Wahlau: interj: expressing incredulity. Singaporean/Malaysian
Show kaler: lit. ‘showing colours,’ to show true nature or the full extent of skill or ability. Malaysian/Singaporean (thanks Yvy)
Dunpraypray: lit. ‘don’t play-play,’ to stop joking around. Singaporean/Malaysian.
Hosay: adj. Best possible outcome. Hokkien.
Nao hiah: interj. lit ‘your elder brother,’; expressing disbelief. Singaporean
Sibeh: adj. Indicating superlative form of adjective to follow. Hokkien Singaporean.
Sibeh ho: adj. The very best. Hokkien Singaporean.
Fengtao: v; Far Eastern headbanging. Cantonese.


At 5:26 am, Blogger L B said...

I swear those mushrooms are good.. Too good, maybe... Gimme some, girl!! LOLOL! You really are on a roll here. I see so much fire in you!

At 8:48 am, Blogger may said...

eh, you wanna submit your script to the Actors Studio tak? cool skit leh! award winning liao!

At 3:04 pm, Blogger plink said...

*furtively hands over spesel TungKu from CKP's stash to LB* ;)
may: 10Q! *blush, imagining the demonstrations and lawsuits already*
Actors' Studio ka? They've already so much to choose from... wonder who they might cast in the roles.

Now I just need to find a doorway large enough for my head to get through....

At 3:30 pm, Anonymous yvy said...

omg...dah lar i dunno wat this my fair lady movie is abt (yalar, yalar....ulu skett) now i read ur post, lagi blur beb!! lol :P i'm too high on squahed mushroom....where's my pot? need mushroom soup.....

*clang...clang..cling in the kitchen*

At 5:12 pm, Blogger plink said...

Yvy: Sorrilar... very specific to location, no? Acherly, this means that you no speak Bengrish, which is a good thing. ;)
My Fair Lady, must watch wan! It's an Ugry Duckryng story. I ought to know....
*sniffing around Yvy's kitchen for mushroom soup*

At 11:30 pm, Blogger Simple American said...

Ooooh. Now I kenna dictionary. keke

At 1:57 am, Blogger Lao Chen said...

Har har har????????

I'm very lost. Is this a cultural thing? I did not watch much TV and movies in my childhood. Nor my youth and current years anyway.

At 3:11 pm, Blogger plink said...

SAm: Compiling a Bengrish dictionary, then? =)
YeeWei: You HAVE to watch My Fair Lady. Gerenti best wan, as Prof LinPeh might say....:)

At 7:20 pm, Blogger Lao Chen said...

Hmm, noted noted. Will try to watch it.

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